Keep Your Goal in Mind

Friend, never give a man the luxury of wasting your time. Every day you spend with him is a day you’re off the market. Some men will string you along because they are selfish. They don’t want you permanently, but they like what you add to their lives. If they can feed you just enough carrots to keep you around, that works for them. Don’t let them. You’re simply putting off the hurt that’s coming your way. It will arrive eventually, and you’ll be more angry at yourself for allowing the relationship to drag on the way it did.

Keep your goal in mind. Set a time limit based on a reasonable dating period and how long you can afford to wait. Stick to your deadline, and be willing to walk. This is a gamble you must take because your future is at stake. You can’t afford to allow someone to have that much power over your future if he is not willing to make a full investment. Think of it this way. He is standing in the way of what you truly desire—a lifetime of love with a partner who sees and recognizes your worth. And that is a prize great enough to put a relationship on the line for.

Excerpt From: Michelle McKinney Hammond. “The Real Deal on Love and Men.


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About Michelle McKinney Hammond

Michelle McKinney Hammond is the best-selling author of over 40 books on living, loving and overcoming. She is also a singer, international speaker, business entrepreneur, and television cohost of TCT's 3D Woman, as well as the Emmy award winning women's talk show Aspiring Woman. Known as a relationship expert and lifestyle architect, Michelle focuses on giving others practical life tools to help them excel in every area of life. Log on to for more info.
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4 Responses to Keep Your Goal in Mind

  1. Sherri says:

    Amen. We simply must walk away. Truth be told, we know when we’re in a dead end relationship. A man knows if he wants to marry you after the first year. And yes the longer you wait to get out, the more it hurts. I speak from experience.

  2. Ade-Oluwa Adebolu says:

    You are right. Although I don’t like dating. It’s a recipe for heart break. However with courtship you know there’s a 90% chance of ending up at the altar in a short period of time. A real man knows what he wants when he sees her. I’ve heard of men, who take a good look a woman, and tell the woman point blank, “I want to marry you.” And now to cut the long story short, they are now happily married . A man who is actively searching for his missing rib, won’t waste time frolicking with a woman he knows he doesn’t want to marry.

  3. D'Edra says:

    So true! I was dating a man and I put a time limit on it. Friends and family told me that I should wait at least a year for him to ask me to marry him. I wanted to wait only six months. I didn’t say he had to marry me in six months, I just said I would only be exclusive with him for six months unless he asked me to marry him. Why do people think you have to “waste” years of your life waiting for a man to ask you to marry him? I’m sure that the man who wants to marry me WILL. Thank you for sharing your wisdom with us all of these years.

    • D'Edra says:

      By the way, he didn’t ask me to marry him. :-) We ended the relationship at eight months. I only prolonged it for two extra months because we were both busy with work and didn’t have time to see each other or anybody else. :-)

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